I need to write something but I’m stuck in my head. I had an overwhelming day – too many people plus voices apparently… I keep trying to mute my laptop but apparently the music playing out of it isn’t actually coming out of it. If that makes sense. A quick whisk around the room told me it wasn’t coming from anywhere else either. Checked outside just to be on the safe side, but no. In go the earphones, block it all out.
My mood has been good, a little too high. My GP commented that I seemed higher than I was last time he saw me and I was pretty buzzy then (two weeks ago maybe? I lost track… could be three or even four). He agreed with me and CPN#4 that my antidepressant (duloxetine) needs to come down from 60mg to 30mg, but I’m getting a prescription of 2x30mg tablets a day so I can fuck around with the dose as necessary (30/45 [30mg one day, 60mg the next, repeat] /60mg). I like this level of trust! I think I’ve made it pretty clear I’m never going to overdose. I did it once and it was a horrific experience, and one I don’t intend to repeat. If I want to die ever again, it’s not going to be an OD. I’m now taking ALL the quetiapine at night instead of split over the day which has had an immediate effect on my sleeping pattern – 15 hours the first night! Although 9 the second and 7 the third, so we’ll see how that holds. Still, 9 and 7 hours are a good amount of sleep and about normal for me, so I’m hoping it’s just balancing out. I’ll find out over the next few days anyway. My astonishingly amazing GP wants to ramp up my quetiapine ‘quite significantly’ if these tweaks don’t work out, but I’m hoping they will so I don’t need to be on huge doses of things. He was making his concerned face. I was seeing CPN five hours after him (why do appointments always fall on the same day? Conspiracy much?), but he would otherwise have wanted to talk to her. Ah well. We shall see how this goes.
I’m off to Canterbury tomorrow for a three day sojourn into the past. I did my undergrad degree at Canterbury, so there are lots of memories there. Lots of chill time for me – relaxing, baths, walks, restaurants (there’s a WAGAMAMA!), walks, walks, Paperchase, epic craft shop, pick ‘n’ mix shop, walks and walks. I think I’ll take my magic hat just in case since I’ll be spending a lot of time outside.
I’m planning to revisit a lot of our old haunts, including Bangkok House (our favourite Thai food place ever), Shake Shed (because why would you not want a custom milkshake [hot mint aero or Cadbury’s fudge and caramel sauce…]?) our university of course, and I may spend some time sitting in the park (weather permitting).
As it turns out I have written a post, despite my overclocked brain cogs (see what I did there? Huh huh huh, did you?), so that can go on the list of achievements for today!
Actually that’s not a bad idea… *sets up spreadsheet with points for achieving various tasks…*